Friday, January 29, 2010

Week In Review


Hello, boys and girls. Have a fantastic weekend! We'll see y'all back here on Monday.

While we're away, if you have a tip about a story or something we should look into, post or get a chuckle from, please direct it here.

Here are some of the week's lowlights (and some highlights, too).
  1. Poor, sad, drug addict Anna Nicole. She filed for bankruptcy but didn't know why she filed for bankruptcy.
  2. Yet another man is pregnant.
  3. Before we knew about Tiger Woods' many jumpoffs, his wife executed a sting operation and cracked the story, then she cracked his skull with a 9 iron.
  4. While on the subject of skull cracking, former figure skater Nancy Kerrigan's father is dead and Tanya Harding is not to blame.
  5. Now back to Tiger. Yet another woman came forward claiming she slept with Tiger and he paid her $500,000 to keep her pie hole shut.
  6. John Edwards, who was running to become president of the United States, has a big penis. Yes, he does. How do we know? It's on his sex tape? His on-screen partner, Rielle is fighting mad and wants to get it back. Um, good luck with that, homewrecker.
  7. More penis talk: This is what a very satisfied penis looks like.
  8. Even more penis talk: Andy Dick is still getting arrested. This time for grabbing other men's, ahem, dicks.
  9. Someone who hates penises anywhere near her vajayjay -- according to legend -- Queen Latifah wants four babies.
  10. Joe Jackson is working.
  11. Quick! Remind this priest that stealing is a sin.
  12. This man wanted his ex-wife dead so he enlisted her kids (their kids) to beat her to death with a bat.
  13. Dude tried to break into prison. Dude ran over five people waiting to cross the street.
  14. Bad mother alert: This woman raped her son for years.
  15. This boy raped a woman in front of is friends -- but because he's young, dumb and... he escaped a long-term prison term.
  16. This 14-year-old boy murdered both of his parents because he didn't want to do chores. Craziness!
  17. Wanna know why you're not getting ahead in life?
  18. Apple announced the iPad -- the world went mad.
  19. Oral sex is not offensive. Even fourth graders know that -- probably because they're doing it.
  20. Employees at a nursing home who abused the elderly are now getting sued. As they should.
  21. One of Puffy's baby mommas says he was cheating on her with the two other baby mommas. Do you care?
  22. Ugly Betty got her ass cancelled.
  23. A Houston pastor got arrested for putting an epic beatdown on his wife.
  24. Then there's this pastor who tried to shoot and kill his son and his family because they're not attending church.
  25. A man trying to get run over by a train is saved...
  26. Why is this man molesting a chicken?
  27. Couples who don't have sex for a year could qualify for divorce in this state.
  28. Will Smith is considering running for political office and he wants the top one. Ehaow!
  29. Woman said Botox killed her 7-year-old daughter.
  30. If there's a hell, this man is going there.
  31. Teabaggers brought their message to NYC in the form of hateful letters which they threw out windows berating President Obama, his mother and pretty much everyone he knows. Harsh.
  32. American Idol could be deadly. This woman has been charged with attempted murder after a fight about the show.
  33. Another day, another sex scandal. This time an NFL player raped a tranny. That's what she says.
  34. Kelis, Kelis, Kelis. What were you thinking?
  35. Man gets drop-kicked in the face.
  36. Oh, no she didn't. A Fox Sports reporter says Michell Obama looks like a Tellytubby!
  37. Etta James is fighting a potentially fatal blood infection and has been hospitalized for a week. Beyoncè is not responsible.
  38. This driver is drunk, high or is a long-time member of AARP. Whatever the case, he needs to be arrested and his license revoked -- immediately!
  39. Woman says a public toilet exploded as she used it.
  40. Michael Jackson's kids will be at the Grammys. Rumor is they may also perform.
  41. Possible animal-rights protester sets himself on fire outside a fur store...and now he's dead.
  42. Crackhead tried to decapitate his roommate over $20 worth of crack. Typical.
  43. President Bush messed up lines in Haiti PSA and he gets yelled at.


YOU SAID IT: Comment of the Week
This is ridiculous. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad. Just like everyone else who walks this earth, that woman once had (and still has) a lot of potential. I don't know what circumstances brought her to where she is today but she could do so much better for herself. However, it is her personal choice to exploit herself and live an empty life. I just hate that she has five children who were born into this seemingly never-ending, perpetuating cycle of drugs, abuse, neglect, and fatherless homes. It's heartbreaking to think of what her children go through while she's out running the streets. God bless that woman and her children. - Anonymous on FY-You: She's a Hustler, Not a Prostitute
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